Call Me, Maybe?

It can be pretentious to discuss one’s calling in life. 

When people ask me why I'm moving to Tacna, Peru as a member of the Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC), I usually babble on and on about the opportunity to be exposed to life in a developing country, to learn Spanish, to work as a teacher, to meet Peruvians, and to figure out what I want to study in graduate school. Somewhere during this verbose explanation I mutter a brief few words about feeling called to accompany the poor and live in solidarity with them and to live out the Jesuit values instilled in me at Georgetown University. This part - the most fundamental reason why I'm moving to Peru - is said in a rushed, almost apologetic tone. 

You see, it can be pretentious to discuss my calling in life because it can imply (A) God has illuminated a path for me to spread His word to the people, and (B) I am both wise and selfless to have heard and chosen to follow God's call. Perhaps I have skewed perception of how others might interpret the words "called by God," but, since neither (A) nor (B) is true, I hesitate to use the phrase. 

I am not so brazen as to announce that I understand what God's plan is for me, nor do I proclaim with 100% certainty that this plan includes me joining JVC and teaching in Peru. How, then, am I to explain this alleged "calling"? 

Everyone has moments in their lives when they find themselves thinking "this is exactly where I'm meant to be" or "this is what I'm meant to do." Whether we attribute these "meant to be" moments to God, the universe, luck, ourselves, of the flying spaghetti monster, there is no doubt that they bring us joy, peace, contentment, and security. I can't help but think that these feelings are God's way of letting us know that we're in the right place, we're doing the right thing, and we have a beautiful future in store for us.  

In July, all international Jesuit Volunteers attended a two week orientation at Boston College; although I approached the two weeks with minor trepidation, I immediately felt a calming sense of security and I truly knew that I was meant to be there with 25 other new JVs as we oriented ourselves towards a new way of life. Now, with three months to go before I move to Peru, I find myself wondering about the uncertainty and challenges the next two years will inevitably hold but, as I think about this commitment I've made to JVC, I am overcome with a profound sense of peace - a feeling that tells me I was meant to choose this program- and an incredible amount of joy - a feeling that tells me I am so blessed to have the opportunity to do this.

So, fulfilling a calling, whether it comes from God or somewhere else, is really nothing more than seeking a life full of peace and joy.

And there is nothing pretentious about living a  joy-filled life.