What do you want to be when you grow up?

A meditation on change, beginning at age five.

a monkey
a teacher
a beekeeper
an art teacher
an actress (on the Disney channel)
a singer
a professional soccer player
a dolphin trainer
Jane Goodall
an actress (on anything but the Disney channel)
an author
a National Geographic photographer
a teacher, high school math and social studies
a mountain climber
an ambassador
a politician
an international tour director
a secret agent
a documentary filmmaker
anything but a teacher (Dear Lord, teaching is going to kill me)
future president Hillary Clinton's secret service detail
an engineer
.
.
.
uncomfortable


That's what I want to be when I grow up: uncomfortable.

I don't mean physical discomfort - although no running water or electricity may, at times, be necessary byproducts of the life I want to lead. Nor am I aiming for elective suffering which is a privilege that only people who don't have to suffer can choose.

What I want is to embrace the discomfort of the inequality and injustices alive in our world, juxtaposed with the privileges afforded me by the color of my skin, my place of birth, and the income of my parents. I want this uncomfortable truth to drive me constantly to action and reflection. I want to surround myself with unapologetic activists, restless dreamers, and people who deserve to have opinions about hot button issues: people who can teach and inspire me. I need to accept the uncomfortable reality that, no matter how much I actively engage in downward mobility and accompany the poor, I can never fully stand in the margins.

I want to be idealistic, but realistic. I want to tackle more than I can handle, and fail, but not become disillusioned. I want my career path to meander through unexpected places. I want to seek ways to challenge myself and grow each time I get too comfortable.

And considering my life is planned out only for the next three months, I'm already doing a pretty good job at being what I want to be when I grow up.